There's More to it

At first glance, Did I Say Thousand Island? seems to be a nice, sweet and fun movie about life in resort towns and working in the restaurant industry.  It is. 

But lurking beneath the surface are other emotions and introspective notions. I knew this, but I was reminded again the other day. The lead actress Jaime Foard called me. She, her husband and their almost 10 year old son watched it together for the first time. Her son loved it (of course) but her husband made a comment that really made me think.

"Cathy always seems angry."

Hmmmmm. Well. You know? You're right. But I'd say it was frustration rather than anger. And I would know. 

This is a fictional movie but it was stitched together with stories that I either gathered or remembered from all my years working in restaurants. Most everything in the movie had happened to someone. When I did research to see if I was on the right track before actually shooting the movie, I absolutely was. 

One of the things I was right about was actually the whole reason why I made the movie in the first place: to potentially impact the attitude towards us. I was tired and frustrated regarding how people treated my decision to work in the restaurant industry. They didn't respect the decision or the career. Even strangers said derogatory things when they'd learn that I have a University degree. Hence the questions that we all get asked that are stated on the website. Things like "real job" or "DO something with your life" or "JUST a waitress" etc. A gal at a wedding in Colorado said that very thing to me when I mentioned the movie. "Yeah! My parents are always saying that to me too. I love my life! Look where I live and get to enjoy it every day!"

People outside our world just don't get it. But I am starting to think that maybe things are changing. In a world turned absolutely upside down in the past couple of years, people were not allowed to go and eat. Now that things have been opening up, maybe they realized how important we non-real-job persons are to their sanity.

 A gal I worked with at Opryland Hotel over 40 years ago and I were talking once after I made the movie. She told me this story: "We went to a pub type place to have a bite to eat. I looked at the middle aged bartender and immediately thought 'look at her, what a loser'.  But as I sat there and observed what went on, I realized that this lady was an angel to the customers at the bar. She was kind and sweet to them. I could tell they were mostly regulars and I thought 'she wasn't just serving drinks. She was important to them. They had a real relationship.' I felt bad that I had made that snap judgement." 

Seeing as we had been bartenders for private parties-- yes a bit different, but still-- I was at first surprised by her initial comment. But she had moved on to the corporate world. Interesting enough, not always the happiest conversations in those years following. Sorry, but it's the truth. Many people have come out of the woodwork since I made the movie to let me know that they really miss their lives from "back then".

So yes. Cathy was frustrated just as many of us have been. But she threw it off and happily carried on, just as we usually do. But I want to make it clear that I didn't set out to put that into the movie. It just came out on its own. Just as I was thanked by more than a few people for "making a movie about me" or "that's my life", there is more to it, underneath the restaurant theme.

This movie has a life of its own, and yes her life is different than I thought it would be, but one thing's for sure...she was born out of LOVE. 

Love for a wonderful life. Love for the fabulous places I have worked at over the years and love for the restaurant people I had and still have in this life. I won't give up at finding the right people to remake this classic and timeless movie that everyone can relate to on one level or another. It would even make a great musical! Yahoo! Peace out! 

 

Don't Be Afraid. Just Ask.

This is personal. Not many people read my blogs so it's OK. I'm putting this out there anyway. 

I'm on a healing tour because my beloved horse Jimmy died suddenly. We were together for 24 years. I'm visiting friends and family all over the States. It's been an adventure and also recently a big learning event. 

I was in Champaign visiting my friend Janet, and she mentioned that Tom Hanks' brother is a professor there. All these years thinking that Tom might be the person who would understand this movie's potential to help and I just find this news out now? Crazy. So we went to his building and I left a note in his mailbox. It was about the movie, my mission and that I needed help. I straight out asked. I have quit being afraid. Or so I thought.

In Nashville, my friend mentioned a guy who sells typewriters and that Tom Hanks visited him. I was seeing a pattern here and thought it was a sign for me to go and meet him in person and ask (not over the phone) if he had any suggestions on how I might contact Tom. By the way, I do think typewriters are cool and had a beautiful mint condition blue Royal that was ruined in storage. I was sad. Anyways, we had a great conversation about many things including the restaurant industry. He's a very nice guy and passionate about his work, dealing in typewriters. And it was a really cool place.

I wanted to ask right away so I wasn't being weird, but as time went on, I felt more uncomfortable and nervous about asking him for help. It got to the end, and I struggled about asking, and ended up not asking but telling him about the movie. Fear. Fear stopped me. It all ended poorly. I left there with a pretty bad feeling. I felt dishonest and uncomfortable.

I sent him an email the day after to apologize and also prove that the things we did talk about were the truth. My friend suggested that I ask then. Bad move. Mistake. I should have had the guts to ask for help right away, but I didn't. Fear is a very strong emotion and I'm not used to all of this. I'm a waitress and a trucker and used to doing things on my own. I'm used to loving driving my 18 wheeler along the highway, seeing the land, meeting people and loving my life.

I didn't ask for this movie. No one has ever heard me say that I wanted to make a movie. EVER!

BUT, I KNOW I was called to make the movie. God provided EVERYTHING! Proof. One person absolutely can NOT do what I did. It was in God's strength. Period. It's His, not mine.

Last fall, I was getting everything ready to move to Vancouver Island and live a trucker type life, while still trying to get the movie remade, but Covid stopped that. I was very frustrated and angry even while loving being back on long haul. Waiting to move was ok, but I figured out that I was not doing what I know is God's will for my life. God's Will. How do I know? There's not enough space here to explain how I know.

Right before I started to write this down here, funny enough, my buddy from High School, with whom I was reconnected when the movie came out years ago, said that I have always been clear on God's call for my life. I didn't know it showed. Jim knows all about the remake idea. I thanked him for his perfect timing because I've been upset since yesterday when I read Kirk the typewriter man's email. 

A couple of nights before, I sent a very short (I knew he hated me) email to apologize AGAIN. He sent me a very long email about how I was selfish, acted covertly, tried to use him for my own good (getting into the movie biz I'm guessing), and lots more. Also how I don't understand famous people and their lives and so forth. I had no idea that I had done all these things. I just knew I really screwed up and something wasn't right. It was the first time in my entire life anyone has said anything this scathing and hurtful, and he was totally wrong about me. 

I returned an email and even asked for forgiveness AGAIN, along with knowing that I screwed up and that from his perspective, I did appear to be these things and I deserved to be beat up. I also put insight into my mission to help him understand this mess. Unfortunately, I doubt he'll read it or ever believe anything I say.  

But I do understand about famous people. Their lives are terrible in my opinion. They lose their lives to the world. Especially the really famous ones. No time to be just who they are. In public anyway. I would never want to be famous. I like my life just the way it is. I have friends all over the world. Real friends, not FB "friends". I'm 'famous' enough thank you very much.

Now I have come to realize that I need to let it all go, upsetting as his harsh words were. He completely misjudged me. He has NO IDEA of what I am all about. He thought I was a person who wants fame, fortune and whatever else goes with it and lots of other ideas of who I am. But he's wrong, and it's all because I was afraid and nervous. I forgot to remember to do this poster's message...(The poster I carried in my car on the whole tour!)

The truth is that my struggle with following God's path for me is because it's NOT what I want. Anyone who knows me knows that. Leave me alone God! I've said it many times. I LOVE trucking. Go away. I made the movie as you wanted. I'm done!

Apparently not. I've spent 18 years on this movie, all my retirement funds at the time--I'm fine now (and it's never been about money for me-- never made one single penny on the movie) and I even moved to Vancouver (alias Nineveh) to try to get connections for a remake, which is the path I ended up on. Why a remake? Because people keep saying how it needs to be out in the "regular" world. IT'S ALREADY BEEN SEEN IN EVERY COUNTRY IN THE WORLD ON THE INTERNET!!! Isn't that enough?!?

I sound angry. I am. Just when I've recommitted to the movie... I'm angry at myself for being such a chicken, which made me appear deceitful and manipulative, and I'm a bit angry at Kirk. His reaction was very very strong (and rightfully so IF I was that type of person), but he had no room for understanding. I apologized twice and he still raked me over the coals. I made a big mistake out of fear. His perspective was only that I "tried to use me so that you could use Tom to get what you want". I get it from his view, but it's wrong. Besides, I already have what I want.

He doesn't know me or my life or the truth and passion of my mission. He just sees what he knows and has experienced, and maybe I was a trigger of some sort. He doesn't know that I'd give the movie away to the right people, to get it remade. Mr. Hanks keeps popping up. In North Carolina, my restaurant pal of over 20 years and I went by the part of the park trail where "Forrest Gump ran". Really?? C'mon! Kirk doesn't know why I made the movie in the first place--to help people understand what we in the restaurant industry are really like, and quit judging us and treating us as less than we are. He doesn't know that I put my entire life into this mission that I never ever wanted. And, he doesn't know that I have given up the fight.

Last night, because I was upset, I watched Milton's Secret . A movie based on Eckhart Tolle's teachings on controlling your emotions and thoughts. Great stuff and free! They were giving it away. At the end they were selling a package with tools to help you learn the teachings. Good movie... with a lure. I just now discovered that it was released in 2016! WOW. Thought it was new!

I've been giving the movie away since 2008. It's free all over the internet. No lure. No sales pitch, no nothing. Just a desire to help people understand and be entertained at the same time. It has helped people. I've been told. Now, I want to get the movie remade because I know it will help even more people. And perhaps in ways I didn't even know about. I've heard that before and was surprised. THAT was my desire. It was not to get into the movie biz--which is why I didn't really try film festivals. Those are for FILMMAKERS! I am a waitress. A waitress and a trucker, and I love them both.

I'm done. But one more thing. One lesson I've learned here is: just ask. Don't be afraid. What's gonna happen? Who knows. Who cares? Another lesson is: when I ask, do it boldly and confidently. I know what I'm supposed to be doing. I know my motives, and who cares what other people think. I don't anymore after this because they might be terribly wrong. But at the same time, don't be such a chicken!! There's only one Person who matters. My success is that when I stand in front of God, I want to hear, "Well done good and faithful servant." And THAT'S why I'm not going to quit or let something like what happened in Nashville destroy my desire to help others by doing the will of God. 

That's it.

Or maybe not. Since I wrote this, I keep thinking about and losing sleep over this whole mess. Last night (a few days after I first published this), I figured out why it's bothering me so much. Yes, I felt bad during and right after the event because I knew I messed up and felt dishonest and all those bad feelings, but not as bad as I felt after getting his email. 

Now I know why. He said, "covertly and ploy". It was my intention to meet him and ask him if he could help and I chickened out. (And I'm sorry if I like typewriters in the mean time.) IF I had intended to act covertly and have a ploy, and use him, I wouldn't feel bad at all. But I do. And, it has bothered me long enough. I have learned a big lesson as stated above and now I have to let it go. Just as in waitressing, you can't solve every problem and people are going to take the ONE mistake you make and erase everything else. No more fear. It gets me in trouble.

Welcome Back

 They're coming back! The restaurants. The people. The fun...

 

Most of us have missed going out to eat with our families and friends. But slowly and surely, we're starting to resume this wonderful event of socializing. There are still many restaurants that are doing take out only, but eventually, hopefully they too will be able to get back to life as we knew it in the past.

It's been tough for most restaurant people and many of these people won't be going back to work in their restaurants... permanently closed. So sad that there wasn't enough help.

I'm visiting Summit County Colorado where I lived for many years and shot a restaurant movie here in 2005. "Did I Say Thousand Island?" was premiered in Breckenridge, Co. in 2007 and continues to be watched on the internet... all these years later. I'm on a mission to get it remade and use it to help restaurant people in the event of another devastating blow from somewhere.

I recently learned about Summit Musicians Relief Fund (SMRF). It started out as a fund to help 2 local musicians who were fighting leukemia. Leon Joseph Littlebird is one of them and he happens to have donated music for the movie back in 2005. This non-profit was subsequently able to help Summit Co. musicians who were put out of work from the Covid-19. Wouldn't it be great if there had been more help available to those in the restaurant world? Use a restaurant movie to help their own.

Or maybe... just get the movie remade for sake of the movie itself. There's a reason why it's been seen all over the world. Maybe because it's a movie that has helped people get an honest idea of what restaurant people are really like: hard working, intelligent, fun and entertaining. Maybe it's about more than the restaurant industry. Or maybe you've missed your pals at your local watering hole or cafe, or wherever you went to unwind and get out of the house, and have more respect for this industry that is usually stereotyped in a very negative way. 

Did I Say Thousand Island? represents the truth about an industry that resonates with all people and has a universal connection. It's personal for many people, genuine and just plain fun. It's a real movie that could be used to help people here in the real world. Let's Do It!

Hometown Cafe

 (Originally on Remake For Restaurants blog posted in May of 2020)

The bus showed up. We weren't ready. In the weeds. Big time.

Maybe we had some warning signs: HIV... H1N1... Ebola...

Now, our favorite hometown cafes, cozy pubs, breakfast nooks, posh places and night clubs are closed and might never open again.

Rodeo cowboys and cowgirls have them. Police and firemen and women do too. Union workers...

They have organizations with funds to draw on in case of injury. Yes, there are some out there locally for restaurant workers, but what about the restaurants?

The restaurant industry is unique on many levels and creates unique situations when it suffers. Right now it's suffering. But I don't need to tell you that.

It's the neighbourhood places you love that won't make it. The big chains probably will. And they're the ones getting the money. Excuse me?

What if there was a fund that could help the little guy? Built locally to help locally. Just to keep them alive.  Not WHEN disaster hits. BEFORE it hits. Yes, people are banning together now, BUT...

I'm a truck driver. Driving my 18 wheels all around North America delivering food. But before, I was a waitress. For over 30 years. Loved it. Which is why I made a movie. Didn't want to. Wanted to drive a big rig.

When I talked to my friend Bobby who is struggling to keep his 31 year old restaurant afloat, I was very sad. I was one of the original crew back in 1988. Stayed for almost 15 years and we recently had a fabulous 30 year reunion. Relationships. What it's about.

The movie "Did I Say Thousand Island?" has been seen all over the world. It's old. Premiered in 2007. Still being watched. Why? People like it and they relate to its people and their stories.

What if it was remade and used to create funds to have for when the next virus hits. And it will. Not being doom and gloomly, just trying to problem solve. I'm a waitress.  Can't help it.

Cut enough lemons. Bake enough pies. Be prepared.

It doesn't have to be complicated. Just takes the right person to get it. 

padivita@gmail.com

Comment from USAToday Article June 2007

 This comment from a physician hangs on my wall to remind me why I made the movie in the first place. It brought tears to my eyes when I first read it, and still makes me smile. USAToday article link.

I'm a professional actor and a physician. I didn't imagine I'd be spending this kind of time today on the lives and careers of restaurant wait staff, but having been a server myself, I'm pleased to take just a few minutes more to show my support for all of us who have been, are or will be part of this profession. Ms. DeVita, even if your film isn't to be a summer film festival winner, you have nonetheless succeeded in what you set out to do.

It isn't everyone who is passionate or cares enough about the human experience to get people talking and hopefully improve some aspect of the world we live in...and you have done just that. You're not just a waitress or a film maker. You're a humanitarian, and for your hard work and sense of social responsibility in serving this slice of life to the masses, you are to be applauded and congratulated with our many thanks.

Like StellaBella12002 who wrote earlier, I waited tables both the summer before I began medical school and two years later before starting my clinical clerkship years. The three months I worked in a family-style, Marriott hotel restaurant proved to be invaluable preparation for what I'd face in the coming years. I think the most beneficial skill I learned was an unexpected one and helped me successfully complete the 26 credit hours I'd be taking in my first quarter...

Twenty years ago, we didn't have handheld computers to input food orders. In addition to learning and retaining a significant amount of information about the hundreds of food and beverage items we served, if I were going to deliver prompt service and turn tables fast, I realized I couldn't take the time to write down orders and then spend five minutes at the ordering station searching for codes I'd need to input for my order.

I wound up memorizing all of the mod look-up numbers assigned to each item or instruction for the kitchen/bar staff. Eventually, I could take an order from a six top, not write anything down, go to an ordering station and download what I had stored from memory. The pace was usually furious and I wouldn't stop for hours on end. Waiting tables finely tuned my ability to focus, attend, listen very carefully and learn what I had to the first time.

Most importantly, I had to learn to do this while under significant pressure to perform and appear calm, cool and confident--precisely what you must bring to your bedside manner as an overworked, sleep-deprived intern or resident. It goes without saying how this ability has also helped me as an actor who frequently gets 15 minutes to learn and work a revised script at an audition.

Aside from sharpening my memory, time management skills and learning how to "never let them see you sweat", I also found I had to be a customer service rep, salesperson, tour guide, caregiver, entertainer and diplomat. Without a doubt, your best servers have expert communication and social skills. I recognized early on that I couldn't expect a 15% tip, let alone 10% if I just brought people the food they ordered. All servers play a role in their customer's dining experience, and the best servers have the ability to perceive and intuitively sense just how much face time a customer wants from them. He/she pays attention to the purpose, mood and climate of the people they're serving.

Whether you're a soda fountain waitress at the five and dime or working at an exclusive restaurant, if you don't have great people skills you're history. Working as a server absolutely helped me with mine and I can't tell you how grateful I am for having had the opportunity to acquire and hone skills that I bring to my present work.                                                                                      iwan2doitall wrote: 4d 21h ago

 

 

 

 

A Miracle and Loss

In the time before I got back behind the wheel of my big rig, I had no intention of working on the movie website. But because of many "coincidences", I ended up overhauling the whole website. 

2 days ago, I woke up with all the usual frustrations- how can I get this done? I'm nobody. I'm a waitress and now a trucker. How can I get to the people who can make this happen? What do I do Lord? I can't do this. Ok, yes, the movie is all over the world by word of mouth. But what about getting it remade as so many people keep telling me to do. I can't do it!

After praying and talking to God, I said ok, I'm going to do what worked when the movie was made in the first place. "Let Go and Let God" (That message was on my phone). I'm going to paint the boat and let it sail so to speak. Feeling a tiny bit better, I got up and as I stepped into the bathroom, a miracle happened. In an instant, I felt God saying, as I was thinking, It's not your (my) movie. Then I thought, "It's not my responsibility." Immediately, I heard Dr. Charles Stanley's voice in my head about a sermon he preached.

He said he was driving to church one day in all kinds of turmoil about all that was happening and suddenly he felt God saying to him, "Charles, it's not your church. It's not your responsibility. It's mine." PHEW! He said he'd never forget that moment. A huge burden was lifted. 

THANK YOU LORD!!! It's not my movie, never has been. I just showed up and did the work. He made it happen. And I had nothing to do with it getting spread all over the world. So I am going to show up and do the work. But I am free! God is in control and I totally knew it then... and FELT IT!

Good thing because yesterday I discovered something "terrible". For over 15 years I have kept all the emails from movie cast members and musicians, waitresses, contacts with many companies, restaurants and organizations, ideas and information I used to help me with the movie. So many folders. Confirmation and verification of facts about the movie. Well, it's all gone. Not there. Deleted forever.

Why? Because I didn't log into my Yahoo account within a year. 

It's happened in the past that I was away from the account. The support person said there must have been a glitch in the system for it to have still been there then. 

But it's all gone now.  Shocked. Sad. Unbelieving. But then it hit me. God is really telling me that I am not responsible. It's His movie. He is in control.

So, I'm putting this story out there because it's the truth. I have no idea of God's plans for me, but I'm not trying to get into the movie industry. I made a movie because I know God called to me, and now I just want to use it to help others. My mission was to get a positive restaurant movie out there and I did.

What's next? I have no idea. But I'm just going to be open and in the meantime live my dream of driving the big rigs. 10-4 good buddy. We gone, ba bye!

I Fibbed. But here's the Truth.

 "Make it look like a lot of people worked on the movie." 

 "Show some amount for the budget to get attention."

"You have to get into film festivals to get anywhere."

These pieces of advice are why I fibbed! I hate to admit this but it's the truth. 

$50,000? Just sounded good. 

 

I didn't have a budget. I just knew that I had to do whatever it took to get the movie made. 

So I bought a Canon XL2 camera and tapes for it. Tapes for the DAT machine I was able to borrow (a bit faulty), a 2-light lighting kit and any gel sheets for balancing light, and anything else I needed.

No one was paid a penny to be involved in the making of this movie. NO ONE. Not the lead actors who donated their time, talents and willingness to pay for their fuel, food or anything else needed to be involved. Not the other people in Summit Co. Colorado who thought it would be fun to be in a movie, or believed in my vision of a clean and positive restaurant movie. Not the locations provided, nor the props, nor the horses, nor the vehicles, nor the editing computers I used for months, nor anything needed to make it happen. Everyone did it for free!

Shot with one camera in about 24 days at over 25 locations (over 35 different sets), with over 80 speaking parts, and a crew of 1. Me. I am the only person who was there everyday.

We shot all the scenes- without any story boards, or a shot list, or a script supervisor, a line manager, a set decorator, a gaffer, or everyone else who works on production. If I had a clue as to what it would take, "Did I Say Thousand Island?" wouldn't exist. Period.

But it does exist and has been seen all over the world. 

Almost like a miracle. It WAS a miracle. No one has that kind of energy. ESPECIALLY when they never ever wanted to make a movie in the first place. It's God's doing. It's really His movie.

THIS was always my dream. AND, lucky me. I do drive all over Canada and the States now. I deliver food so I am an essential worker in these crazy Covid-19 times.

But I just overhauled the website again. I can't give up on using the movie to help others. Not for water anymore. I can't make people care about water. I can't make them care about restaurants either. But I believe that we are in deeper than we think and it's going to be a long time before restaurants enjoy life as it was before CV19. Too many local Ma and Pop restaurants aren't coming back. Very sad. 

But what if they had help? It can be done. It IS being done. Guy Fieri,  Matthew McConaughey and Sean Penn are just a few of the people helping restaurant people. So remake a popular movie and use it to raise money to help restaurant people, like what CORE is doing. Your friends and neighbors! No matter how many times you hear this...we really are all in this together.

World Water Day Tomorrow

It's really always been about restaurants and my love of the industry.

I was looking at old emails the other day and got inspired all over again. Even though I don't get comments on my blogs. I don't have many views on YouTube for either the movie or the trailer, and took my movie off of facebook because I don't have many likes, I still can't seem to give up on getting the movie remade.

Maybe it's because people like it. I know for a fact that hundreds of thousands of people have watched it and then tell their friends to watch it. How else would it have spread all over the world without a stick of advertising or campaigning? Why else would someone put "HOT NEW MOVIE" on a torrent site when it's 5 years old?

Maybe it's because when I do sit and watch it with new friends, we sit around talking about our own restaurant experiences and we relate to the movie on interesting levels and in fun ways.

Maybe because it wasn't my idea in the first place. I know in my heart and will always know that God called me to make it and this is the path of my life. How else could a feature-length movie with over 80 speaking parts, and 26 locations with multiple sets within those locations, ever get made in 25 days by basically one person? It wouldn't. But God provided everything: so it did.

I am currently working in commercials in Vancouver and am amazed at how many people it takes to make a commercial. Granted, the production value is extremely high---not like my movie as the reviews say. But they also say that my movie is sincere and honest and a gem of a story. I believe that is why it's been seen in every country of the world and then some.

So that's why I won't give up. Honestly, sometimes I really want to. My life would make more sense and be less frustrating and difficult. But, when was following your heart and doing what you believe is God's will for your life easy?

Remake 4 Water may no longer be a website, but I will never stop my passion for helping others get water. I am up to 11 wells in Cambodia now and will keep on going until I'm ashes. So although World Water Day STILL isn't on any calendars that I have seen, I will honour it and keep trying to help. 

10 Years later and still growing

Today marks the 10 year anniversary of the premier of "Did I Say Thousand Island?" in Breckenridge Colorado. It's a fun movie set in the resort community of Summit County and shows what life is like in  when you work in the restaurant industry.

Movie synopsis:

Have you ever lived in a resort town? Cathy and Meagan do, and they're always having fun in the mountains of Colorado. Rodeos, skiing, sheet pan surfing, camping, horseback riding... you name it. How can they always have so much fun? They work in the restaurant business! But it's not always fun and games. This is real life: people die in avalanche chutes, parents get sick and you move home, and sometimes you darn near slice off a finger cutting peppers for the nice and quiet lady on table 15. But not everyone at table 15 is nice or quiet.

Sometimes you want to smack 'em. Sometimes you bust a button laughing with them. That's the business. Both waitresses are single, in their thirties and have college degrees. But they differ in their views of their chosen careers as well as their life situations. While Maegan's trying to catch life's curve balls, Cathy's enjoying a smooth romance with the handsome newcomer, but she gets nervous as things progress. Can this really work? We'll see. From iced tea to Opus, we re-discover the true meaning of friendships while celebrating the lives of restaurant people.

I have been on a mission to get the movie remade to use it for water awareness, but realize that I just can't make people care about water. Either they do or don't. So I am back to my original passion and that's the restaurant world.  Restaurants, especially in any resort community are a great way to spend your time working and anyone who has done it for any length of time will agree.

After hearing time and time again that I need to remake the movie so more people can see it, I am back on the road to find the right people to remake it. Seeing as it's already been seen all over the world, it has an audience, and that would grow after people see the movie. How do I know this? Because if people are still telling their friends to watch it 10 years later, and it's a no-budget guerrilla shot film, then there must be something about it. These are some of the many comments I get in emails:

"It goes even further than restaurants: not living up to someone else's expectations for your life. It's about doing what you want to do and finding your own happiness."

"Thank you for an enjoyable evening last night and the warm, friendly feeling that lingers when I think about the film."

"... I think your movie is really about finding ways to love your life...finding the heart of whatever you are in, and getting it."


"James Cameron aside, Hollywood seems so afraid of risk these days, always looking to do something that has already proven itself and so we get Home Alone 4. At the same time we see the big stars producing their own films for greater control. I could see your movie being remade by producer / star Sandra Bullock with only a few million of her own dollars invested and being a box office success. If not Sandra Bullock, then one of about 30 other celebrity / actresses." 

So I am back at the beginning again. It was impossible for one person to make a movie like this, but it happened. It's going to take a miracle to make it happen again. But... I have a great relationship with the One who makes miracles happen and I am never going to give up.

For the Love of Restaurants

Years ago in Florida, I was talking to the bartender about our jobs and he said, "Of course, we do it for the money." Gosh, I thought I did it for the fun! Grant it, bartenders can make more than servers in places, but still.

Maybe I am weird (as I have been told), but I loved working in all the restaurants over the years for many reasons. Regardless of what other people thought and think, the restaurant industry is a blast. It offers a fun and flexible life style--allowing you to spend time with family and friends, or activities that are important to you, and decent money at the right places--even great money. And, you can live in a place, while other people save money all year long, just for the chance to spend just 2 weeks in your home town. Pretty great!

When I was changing my Remake 4 Water website, I thought maybe...Remake 4 Money. Seems that money is what makes the world go round, as they say, but I didn't like the sound of that. Especially as money has never been my motivation. (My family and friends can verify that wee fact.)

So I decided while out walking in the cold clear Alberta night, I know!!! Remake 4 Love! Yeah... then people can think whatever they want. Love of what? You fill it in. Restaurants. People. Fun. Movies. Stories. Beautiful scenery. Horses. Romance. Money (for who ever remakes the movie-- that has been seen in every single country in the entire world and many territories and continues to be downloaded hundreds of times a day; it will happen) Whatever the love-- that was it. Love. Because I believe LOVE makes the world go 'round. Money is just a tool.

"It's not just a job, it's a lifestyle". That was the tagline for the movie years ago. It's a fact. Restaurant life is more than a job. Ask your friends or family who work in it and like it. Actually, when I was doing research before doing the movie, 95% of the people I spoke with really liked their jobs. It's such a fallacy that restaurant people hate their jobs and can't wait to find something else-- as all the movies, media and people outside of the biz will happily tell you. Boneheads.

So, because I still believe that the movie is a fun and entertaining coupla hours, as do thousands and thousands of people who must agree with me, seeing that they keep telling their pals about the movie, I will never give up that the right people will find it and remake it for the masses. It's just a fun movie that you will relate to in some way. So why not? Tell your second cousin on your mother's great uncle's daughter's brother's side of the family tree, that a fun movie awaits their talents, resources and savvy to remake a restaurant movie with heart.

Ok, gotta go truckin'! We gone. Bye bye...;-)

Where's The Beef?!

It's comin'. It's comin'. But not on a platter.

Do you remember that slogan? Clara Peller was the cute little ol' lady who shouted it at all of us back in the late 1980's. What a massive ad campaign THAT was. And....it worked. 

At Wendy's, sales jumped 31% to $945 million in 1985 worldwide. Wendy's senior vice president for communications, Denny Lynch, stated at the time that "with Clara we accomplished as much in five weeks as we did in 14½ years."  (Taken from Wikipedia.)

Just as a great ad campaign boosts sales, great movies boost... ah... well... what do great movies boost? There are many answers to that question and I suppose it really depends on the person watching the movie. But regardless of your answer, there is absolutely no doubt that movies and the celebrities that are in them have a huge effect on the lives of people all around the world. And this is exactly why I will never give up on my mission to find the right people to remake my indie movie.

I was thrilled a few weeks ago when I discovered that we have officially been seen all over the world: in every country...196 total, and I wouldn't doubt if there are even more. It's just that 196 is the magic number the United Nations agree is the number of countries on the planet. There are many websites where you can get the movie downloaded for free and when I check on them now and then, it's really cool to see how many people at any given time are getting the movie. It makes me realize how popular the remake will be when it happens. That is, if it's made with the same element that draws people in now. I believe that will happen, and I am not giving up!

So what did I mean by "but not on a platter"? I can't really waitress any more, but am still in the food biz--that is when you consider hauling cattle to be an integral part of the process: albeit not the most pleasant part. I love the driving... I just don't look them in the eye when I drop them off. I do try to give them a comfortable final ride and watched the Temple Grandin movie because I believe in treating animals with respect regardless of their role in my life.

What does this have to do with my movie? Well, given the fact that it takes almost 2000 gallons of water to produce merely 1/2 pound of beef, and there have been unprecedented droughts in some of the beef producing states, maybe we need to take a closer look at how we act concerning our water. If we don't make changes to our behavior, we are in big trouble. My mission is to find the right people to remake my restaurant love story movie and use it to bring awareness and funds to the serious water situation. Water and restaurants are related in more ways than the obvious one and I won't quit trying until I find the right people.

Where's the beef? Hopefully, still on its way........

Where's My Food?!

I just finished a post for Remake 4 Water and it occurred to me that I needed to post here as well, on the same subject: Documentaries.

In the Remake 4 Water blog, I gave stats about their status in the movie going public and as sad as I am about the un-popularity of them, there is one out there at the moment that needs mentioning. "Where's My Food?!" by Lee Godden.

 I watched the trailer and it seemed that he was being very honest and upfront about the restaurant industry-- which is the largest employer in the US, outside of the government, and I think it's the same in any country.

Think about it. In any small town, no matter how small it is, it might not have a bank, a gas station, or a barber, but you can bet it has a restaurant, or at least a cafe where the locals can come for the daily gossip and a cup of coffee. We all go out to eat at some point and restaurants are always a hot topic in blogs or articles and always get a high number of comments, many of them: quite heated.

Which is why I made my movie in the first place: to show waitresses and waiters as the fun and intelligent people they are and that restaurants are a great life! Even though I saw some of the negative aspects in Lee's trailer and yes of course they are there in life (and his is a doc after all), but I was so tired of movies focusing on them and portraying us as total losers, all the time. "Waiting" is a great example of that negativity and I have to say how thrilled I was to see the absurditiy of it. Again, yes I know there is a negative side, but do we have to focus on it? I had a great career in restaurants and ask Paul Paz about his.

Paul runs Waiter's World and is still loving being a fabulous waiter in Oregon. He is in "Where's My Food?!" and talks about his life in restaurants. So my message was about respect and treatment of people in the business and I hope that in the end, Lee's movie does the same, maybe with a different slant. But now I am going to use my movie for another reason, hence Remake 4 Water. Still a narrative feature length movie, but with another message incorporated into it, and that brings me again to the point I have been saying all along.

There's a message that has to get out to people, and no matter how many great and wonderful documentaries there are (and there are many about water and how it's crucial that we change our relationship with it), people don't hear the message! But if we incorporate it with a fun movie and make it entertaining, they will start to hear. But why "Did I Say Thousand Island?" ? Because restaurants can't operate without water, everyone goes out to eat and the movie has already been seen all over the world, which is amazing for a "no-budget-no-name-non-marketed" movie!

Coincidentally (nothing with God is a coincidence), a Calgary based production company, Nomadic Pictures is shooting here in High River, so I went down there to see whom I could talk to about R4W. I ended up meeting a cool guy named Zoltan Barabas--(cool name too eh?) who understood my reality about "Did I Say Thousand Island?" and how I am not a filmmaker...nor do I want to be. I am a waitress-- well now I am a trucker, but anyway, I told him my story, gave him the movie and he said he would pass it on.

I really hope that Lee's movie does well for him, and I think it would help people understand some things about the restaurant industry and its people, but also that it will give credibility to my opinion that restaurants are a popular topic-- from both sides of the table. I know that "Did I Say Thousand Island?", when it is remade by those in the biz, will be a hit, and I am not giving up.

But in the meantime, check out Lee's movie and support his efforts! Peace out from the Great White North... and Happy Valentine's Day too! ;-)

Scrambled or Fried?

That's the title of today's reading in "Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy" by Sarah Ban Breathnach. A book that I have been reading for 16 years. She writes it as a year long journey to change, but I think it takes a life time to change a life. There's so much about this adventure, it can't be figured out in a year. And life does throw curve balls: this is not what I planned on doing today...

I love Sarah's book and maybe reading it again is overkill, but she resonates with me and I love her prodding and insights into life. I better understand some things now, as I have changed on the inside which makes for change on the outside. She has a Spiritual thread to it and I love how she weaves God into our everyday lives in a way that is user friendly. I know the book has helped me greatly in my journey and I have been buying it for friends a lot lately.

So I've read this passage many times, but for some reason, today it hit me, again. Hard. Is it because I watched Erin Brockovich last night? Is it because I saw how much she cared about something close to her heart and know how much I still care? Not only about water, but how people view waitresses. By the way, Erin, as you probably know, had a cameo in the movie. She was a waitress.

Sarah talks about the demands of life, and when you just can't take it anymore, you just want to jump on a bus and start life over as a waitress in a diner somewhere out west. You want to run away. I get it. I get it that waitresses have a different life and maybe don't have some of the pressures that those in the corporate world have, but hold on a minute!

To quote Sarah: "Of course you're not going to do it, but contemplating a plan of escape is an imaginary mechanism to let off steam from life's pressure cooker. No more overdue bills, arguments over cooking cleaning, carrying out the trash, charge accounts, or...care-taking of an elderly parent...When you think you can't handle it anymore, a life that revolves around asking customers if they want their eggs scrambled or fried holds a certain appeal." WOW! That's it? A life that revolves around only a question? Sounds like waitresses live in another world. (Waiters too but since she mentions diners, I'll generalize and say waitresses.)

Do we not have to deal with all those things mentioned above? Do we live in a bubble? Are we apart from the everyday life that other people live? Do we not have struggles and demands too? Unfortunately many people think so, because serving people food is still not considered a real job, hence our lives might be not so serious either. I don't want to argue that point-- it was the whole reason why I made my movie in the first place, and I am still getting that message out. I'm not angry about it, just tired. I've been fighting it all my life. I just want people to understand that the life of a waitress is very different than people think from what they see and read in many forms of media.

But maybe waitresses do live in another world. Maybe we do live fantasy lives? Hmmmm. Let's see... We don't usually stress over work when we are at home. Our stress is at work and stays at work. We can usually get days off for important family functions or events with a simple shift change. We always have cash in our pockets and don't have to wait in line at ATM machines. We don't have to work for a company for 5 years before we get more than 2 weeks vacation. We can go to work, make good money and still be home when our children get home from school. We can move to a new town and land a job within a day or so. (At least that has been my experience from over 25 years and in a "normal" economy.) We get to know our co-workers really well (without competition for a raise) and many times keep those friendships for years and even a lifetime. We usually have a lot of  fun at work with the customers who come in.We can take weeks off to travel the world if we want and still have a job when we return.

I could go on, but you get the point. Am I just saying the good things, yes. That's because there are other blogs that mention the down side of waitressing (serving) and most of them deal with the fact that we aren't respected, which leads to bad behaviour from customers. My friend Patrick Maguire has a great blog that addresses many of these issues in a mature and insightful manner. It's called: "I'm Your Server, Not Your Servant" which by the way, is very close to a line in my movie that was left on the cutting room floor as the scene was too long. But it will be in the remake, that's for sure!

So even though I was going to be doing some water blogging and research today, I was sidetracked. Why? Because I still, and always will be, on the soapbox for trying to get people to treat servers as the intelligent fun loving hard working people they are. Can people just stop acting as if servers aren't real people with real lives, real families, real jobs, real situations that everyone who walks upright faces? Or maybe we could practice the Golden Rule a bit more? (and that goes for servers with bad attitudes too!)

Am I being too hard on Sarah, or taking this too seriously? Maybe. But I took my life as a waitress seriously. I seriously had a wonderful life and still do! By the way, when I went to get Sarah's website address, I came across information that saddened me. Apparently Sarah made a fortune and lost it all. I will have to look into that deeper. Maybe she forgot some of the wonderful things her book taught...

But when that fantasy of running away to be a waitress in a diner happens, maybe you might see it as an exciting adventure and a great way of life. Maybe you might see it for what it really is. Being a waitress is a great life! "We don't live our jobs, we live our lives!" Another line from the movie. But that one made it to the screen...

For The Record

Blogging used to be a simple way to share thoughts with others. It's escalated into so much more but I never caught on so back to basics and sharing thoughts just for the record.
 
Water. Always been my thing. Always been on water patrol everywhere I went.

Waitressing. Loved it all my life. Yup, got the university degree, and from a great school by the way, but stayed out of the corporate world. Just didn't fit my life (and I'm not alone).

Movies. Fun to watch, but never wanted to be in the biz. Still don't and won't ever be.

Why these three things? No idea. Just the way it happened. Now my mission has to do with all three.

You know? I just want to help servers to be seen in a way that isn't degrading. I want to tell the public in a nice way, that they might want to consider changing their opinions about servers. (AND I heard it again on Friday night) "People are waitresses because they can't do anything else."  Really? But I loved my job and made good money, even though I always hated filling out my tax forms and wished I didn't have to put "waitress" as my job. I hate to admit it that I allowed others to influence my feelings, but I always felt inferior, and I'm not alone it that either. "A real job"? Tried them. Made less money. Had more stress. Had less fun. I was miserable. Sure if I stuck to them for years I would have made more money, but it was never that important to me. My freedom and quality of life has always been worth more. Call me crazy that's fine with me--always have been, but it's kept me from goin' insane. Sing it Waylon!

I want to help people know that water is a concern that has to be addressed. We really can't waste much more time on this fact. So how do we address it? Stars! With stars! Not the kind that twinkle, the kind that billions of people have to know what they do. The kind that everyone wants to follow, copy or be associated with. If you put a Hollywood star and a Nobel Peace Prize winner in the same room. Who do you think will get the most attention? Who draws the crowds?

So remake a movie that has already been seen all over the world. Put together a soundtrack that has music that crosses generations (which is easy to do these days), and open it on World Water Day or during World Water Week and get money for water orgs. After that, everyone can make their money.

I haven't written this down, but have told some people: when I got back from Ireland where I lived while I was writing the script, I happened to watch "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" when it was released on DVD. I ended up watching it twice in a row-- listening to the commentary the second time. I had 4 pages of notes. Nia and I were thinking and feeling the same things when we were writing our respective movie and how we hoped people would feel when they watched it! I was amazed and very happy at the time. I was on the right track, and now I know my movie hits a nerve--in a good way.

Is it crazy to think that any good clean movies, fund raising events (outside of politics) or generous group actions can come out of Hollywood anymore? I don't think so. Despite what so many people on the street say, I think there are a lot of good people there who are getting involved in social issues even more in innovative ways. Use up and coming stars. Use interns and film schools to supply the crew. Use the companies that are water conscious for product placement. Use existing music from musicians who care about water. Have the CD sales go to water. Advertize who is involved and showcase their generosity and concern. We seem to do it with all the bad, why not with some good for a change?

My friend cautioned me as what to write here in this blog, but I just want to shout: IT'S SO EASY, THIS WOULD HELP! IT CAN BE DONE! I ALREADY HAVE AN AUDIENCE! As a Hollywood movie this would be popular. It already is. Here's an idea. We already have: get this free action toy at _________when you buy a ________. Some plastic thing that is played with for a day and ends up in a land fill. Let's try: get this refillable water bottle at ___________ when you buy a  large salad  (promoting healthy eating while we're at it) during opening week. Let's use social media to promote and not spend millions on advertising. Word of mouth works we all know that! There are loads of ideas and ways to make this happen that would benefit so many people.

Being raised in the burbs of Chicago but born on a farm, my dream was always to live in a cabin in the mountains and have a horse. Well I've had that for years so I have to default to one of my other dreams. That was: to do something big that would help a lot of people. Never had a clue how, what or if that was even possible. Well it is and this is it. So crazy as it might be, I will persist. There will be someone who discovers Remake 4 Water and says, hey, she might have something there.

Changes

When you get into the any industry, you get the job and apply the skills you have been taught in the education system. Since most people don't go to school when learning the Hospitality Industry, they tend to learn on the job. Usually starting out in diners or family owned places, or even some corporations where they are willing to hire inexperienced servers, taking the attitude that skills can be taught but attitude can't be, you might get a job there.

Many people outside the biz think that anyone can be a server. So this is what happened last week at work. (I work very part time while I work on Remake 4 Water) One of the girls who is training to be a waitress, served glasses of water to her table by setting the tray down on an empty table then took the glasses off the tray (she has bussed tables for months as a hostess so she can carry a tray-with 2 hands). When I mentioned to her that she wouldn't be able to do that if the restaurant was full and she really needed to learn how to balance glasses on a tray, she said she couldn't do that.

Another waitress was working that same week and asked me to help her serve 4 cups of coffee. She complained that she kept spilling the coffee on the under liners. Sure! I love to help people learn, so I showed her how to stack them and keep the cups on the tray so if spillage occurs, it's on the tray. Then you put the cups on the under liners when you get to the table. "Oh that's too much work!" was her reply.

Honest.

Is this piddly stuff? Of course it is! But what it points to is the fact that there's trouble brewing. Are these the only examples? No and I bet that anyone who has worked in the industry sees it. Training has to be an important part of the process. Would you want to be paying $28 for a dinner and have a server who can't serve? I wouldn't! We won't even get into the soft skills or some other finer points.

I know there are loads of  blogs out there that complain about customers, but we need to look out from the inside now and then too! We have to teach people how to be good servers or the industry will continue to be seen as unprofessional, full of transients and people who don't care. I made "Did I Say Thousand Island?" with the intention of showing servers in a positive light and there are many in that light-- people who love their jobs and care about their customers.

It's not all from only one side of the table--and neither is the movie. By the way, the entire movie is available to watch right on that page. Later. I want to go and enjoy riding my horse before I go to work!

2 Broke Girls

I don't watch TV. Period. Haven't for years, so when I heard the title of the show and discovered that it was about waitresses, I thought it was yet another negative and demeaning show about restaurant workers, so I didn't  look into it.

But then the other night I thought hey, why not. It just hit me to go to You Tube and see if I could watch an episode. Living in Canada, we don't have quite the same access to shows as people in the States. Surprised that I could watch parts of an episode, and even more surprised when I looked at the clock and it was nearing 2 am, I was shocked! It really was entertaining, funny and very well written. Ok, so it's a different approach than my movie, it's a show with some realistic restaurant events and situations. Mind you, if  they happened in some of the places I've worked you'd be fired, but it's still fun to see it on the screen. 

Looking into it again today, I discovered that it indeed is being renewed and matter of fact is at the top! Yea for a restaurant show! 'Bout time! This can only help the idea that a restaurant show or movie is marketable, which is what I've been saying all along. Tie it with helping others especially concerning water and you win both ways. By the way, the number of celebs who concern themselves with water continues to grow. When I looked  a couple of months ago it was at 188 and today it's at 205.

I don't know if the 2 broke girls get their cupcake business going or not, and maybe they are cruder than "Did I Say Thousand Island" is as a whole, but it's fun to see a show that at least doesn't degrade servers in the usual ways of the media. Keep going! By the way, 1000 Island continues to be downloaded 1000's of times a day! When I emailed and asked the host server if the numbers were real, he said yup, most likely they are. Cool, eh?

Horses and Chimpanzees

The average age of the crowd that went to see War Horse last Tuesday was surprising. Maybe it was the day of the week, maybe the time of year, I don't know. But I would say the average age was over 40.

When I premiered "Did I Say Thousand Island?" in Colorado, people of all ages came to see it, but I have been surprised over time that I get the most emails from middle aged folks who say they enjoyed the movie. One of the largest demographic today is women over 35, and that bodes well for a remake of this restaurant movie. Aren't most servers female? Yes. Which brings me to another interesting fact. Two of the most popular offerings the public has had about the restaurant industry in recent years have been written by men who have spent only 10 years in the industry in one city. I'm talking about the book Waiter Rant and the movie Waiting.

I thought Waiter Rant was very well written, and the content was, I am assuming, true for a New Yorker who is a waiter by default, but it certainly isn't true across the board. Too much research that I did when I was making my movie just disagrees. Many waitresses and waiters actually do enjoy their job, and I can bet more would if it was considered to be a "real job".

"Did I Say Thousand Island?" shows servers as the fun and smart people they are and as I have been told many times, is a realistic portrayal of the restaurant industry. That must be why it's been downloaded over 55,000 times in 183 countries so far. For a no-name movie made by basically one person (with awesome help  from friends) that's pretty good. Here's a link to the latest press release talking about the new project going on with the movie concerning water.

Why did I put chimpanzees at the top? When I saw War Horse, one of the ads at the beginning was for Chimpanzee, a documentary/story about a wee monkey, and if you go and see it during the opening week, Disney will donate a portion of the proceeds to the Jane Goodall Institute. That's the exact idea I have been proposing with Remake 4 Water for a long time, so see? It can be done. The difference is that my movie isn't mostly a documentary, it's a story. It's a story about everyone--everyone goes out to eat. Remake 4 Water...c'mon. Let's Do It!

Returning to "My Community"

After returning home from my 6 week trip down east as they say here in Canada, I have come to realize something. I've been concentrating so hard on the "water" aspect of this mission, that the other part of my heart of this mission has fallen by the way side.

It occurred to me this morning as I was throwing away the brochure from a restaurant that I went to in Maine. I had intended to give them feedback from our visit (and it wasn't exactly positive) but decided not to, as it wasn't positive. But then I thought WAIT, if I do it in a kind way, it might actually help them. How can they fix a problem if they don't even know it exists? Then it hit me how no matter how much time I spend away from waitressing, I will never lose the love I have for the job and freedom based lifestyle, the people and the desire to do something about the negative attitudes and stereotypes that remain. Maybe it's a losing battle, but if you don't try, how can things change?

Whenever there's an article relating to anything in the restaurant business, it always receives so many comments. Why? People usually have an opinion because it might have happened to them, or they just want to be heard. Or maybe because the restaurant biz is the largest private employer in the US and probably world.  That's why I am working to get my movie remade so it's seen by more people. I had so many emails saying that it "should get out there more so people see it".

Now after attending the International Water Forum at the UN in September, I know I'm on the right track. What was the biggest issue with the Global Water Crisis? AWARENESS!! That's right. People just don't know there are water troubles. So by combining a "fun and engaging" (quoting a viewer) and realistic movie about restaurant life with the subject of water (which a restaurant can't run without), we can get the messages out! We're not stupid people in the business, and wouldn't you love that cranky and demanding customer to hear that! It's in the movie. That, and a lot of other messages. Do you really like doing separate checks when the people are all over the place!? It's in the movie too...

Why do people think we spit in their food? It's in the movies. Why do they think we hate our jobs? It's in the movies. Why do they think we're stupid and are total losers? It's in the movies. It's about time there's a movie that tells them the way it really is. By the way, we just added another country: people in 182 countries have seen the movie and it's growing everyday! Not bad for a 5 year old nobody movie made by a waitress. C'mon. Let's Do It! www.remake4water.org

July 4th and restaurants

Howdy!

Belated Happy 4th of July to you all (this is being posted after midnight where I am). By now the fireworks are just a memory of ooohs and aaaahs and I hope it was a grand event for you and your friends.

I was thinking today about this Holiday and how restaurants handle it. I've worked at all types of restaurants and depending on the climate of the restaurant, they treat these summer holidays differently. Well, at least they should.

At one place, we were on the main street and were a more casual dining place in the day and more elegant at night. There was, as I remember the right staffing for each shift according to the tendencies of the past. We all know how things can be inconsistent, but still, good owners and managers tend to look at past trends, throw in some common sense and go from there. Other places....not so much.

One year I missed a family reunion in Canada because of poor planning. I worked at a very elegant place in a resort town that is known for out door activities. The owner/manager thought we would be very busy and wanted a very full staff. I on the other hand knew we wouldn't be busy, but couldn't convince her of that fact. She was relatively new to the restaurant industry and that coupled with the fact that she wasn't wearing her common sense hat led to my missing a fun family event. People bbq on this middle-of-the-summer event. They don't tend to go to posh places in droves. It's a hamburger kind of Holiday.

Well I was also thinking today how this simple situation in the life of waiter or waitress could be a scene in the remake. A casual way to educate managers. I was out to lunch with a pal last week who had recently watched the movie and she told our waitress how she learned something not to ever do again when she went out with friends. It was the separate checks with couples all over the place scene. The movie is a way to educate as well as entertain.

That's all for now. Oh yeah, by the way, that 4th of July night when I was forced to miss the reunion? I waited on 2, yes count 'em, 2 people. The next night wasn't much better...;-) Ah well, that's the biz.

Waiters

Am I missing something? I don't get it. I can't say for sure because I'm not in their shoes. I can only say what I know from experience, but I just don't get it.

Last night I started reading "Waiter Rant". Some friends had given it to me a while ago and I have just now picked it up. Everything in its time. I was immediately zapped back to the opening minutes of "Waiting".

My immediate feeling is that Steve and Rob share the same opinion about the restaurant business. Why did they both feel the need to open their book and movie with the subject of sex? Specifically involving the utensil they both have that I don't. Obviously they were setting a tone for their work and I don't get it.

Did I coincidentally find, in all my 25 years plus of waitressing, places of employment where the waiters actually liked their job and respected their co-workers: both male and female? Did I just happen to get jobs at places where vulgar language and crude behavior were absent? Did I find the only restaurant environments where we swore and joked around, but we still had respect for each other even if it was only for a season or a year? Did people suddenly change all their language and behavior when I walked around the corner and came within earshot or eyesight? Somehow I find all that hard to believe. Ok, before you start swearing at me saying how I am 'full of shit', I will briefly tell you about a couple of the places where I worked.

The restaurant where I worked for 15 years was probably filled with the most colorful characters. Of course there were sexual innuendos flying all over the place, that's normal. That's the biz. It's not like the corporate world. You know that! Guys are always saying things... You know, like when you bend down to pick something up, and one of those guys are there and they say, "While you're down there." Or one time I had a chef say how he wanted to take my long braids and thread them through his belt hoops. It was all in good fun--whether he was serious or not, and he didn't actually say "Hey Patti how about you and I go out back and you give me a blow job". See the difference? Maybe you do and maybe you don't. But I do and it has to do with respect. Sure you have the underlying subject of sex running rampant all night long--it usually is, but we weren't vulgar about it. AND it wasn't the focus of our time there, we're busy working hard!

I didn't get far last night because I was thinking, "oh no not again". I'm going to have to read the book (research) and actually, I think it will be entertaining and fun in a way, but it will be going overboard with certain issues because it sells. "Waiting" was filled with unrealistic situations about sex that I have never seen nor heard about. I know the movie was very popular with the 18-22 year old boys, and maybe that's what they do. I'm not a boy, so I don't know about the obsession with their equipment. When I was at the theater watching "Waiting", with in the first 5 minutes, a middle aged couple walked out. I really wished I could have joined them--research kept me there. It was tough. I will say however that there were a couple of realistic scenes about what goes on in the back of the house, but only a couple and they didn't have to do with food, but rather with actions of the waitstaff and the "acting out front" that goes on in the throes of frustration.

"Waiter Rant" was a popular book and I am pretty sure I will say "oh yeah, that DOES happen" to many parts, but all the sex at work? (If it's in there--again, I didn't get far.) I'm not saying it NEVER happens, of course it does, and no I'm not a prude, believe me I'm not, but I never ran to the walkin or to a bathroom stall to have sex in the middle of a shift like in "Waiting", and I don't know anyone who has. You wait until AFTER the shift for crying out loud! What's wrong with you guys!

The back of Steve's book says and I quote, "and ways to ensure that your waiter won't spit in your food." Seriously? In all the hundreds of years of combined service when I interviewed servers for my movie, about 99% said they never had, never seen and never would, spit in someone's food. I was told about one waiter who was fired because he joked about it. FIRED! Joked about it! So all this stuff about spitting, is in the movies and in the minds of waiters turned writers. Waiters who respect their jobs and their bosses (maybe that's harder to find with some of the managers around), would not spit or worse in someone's food. Besides, they'd have to hang around and wait to watch the person eat. What do they gain and who has time for that? Yes I can hear it now from that miniscule percentage of people who actually have tampered with someone's food, how I'm the idiot and don't know what real servers do. Well, sorry but you're wrong. Have you done the research I've done? Have you worked for over 25 years in the industry and never seen anything remotely like that?

My experience is that restaurant people have more integrity and self respect than that! I worked at one restaurant in Wisconsin where even the 'F' word was never heard. One time in a panic, I let it fly and did I ever get in trouble. I was surprised to be honest, because it kinda is an accepted word in the fast furious and stressful world of serving. It just kinda happens. Nothing is meant by it usually-- just a reflex.

Yes this post is probably charged a bit more with emotion that I usually am, but I am so tired of people portraying servers as crude and lewd people. And when it's done by those in the industry just to sell their stuff, well.... Yeah yeah I know, there are people like that in the industry-- of course there are, but do you have to start out like that to set that same negative tone that those of us who actually like the industry are trying so hard to fight? C'mon guys. Or maybe it's just a guy thing. You know, I'm going to call some of my former co-workers and ask them some questions. I know they'll be honest, they have nothing to gain. And you know? I really don't care if I get any rebuttals that I am way off. At least I'll know that someone is reading this! Peace out...

Ch Ch Ch Changes

Wasn't that a great song? Well now we're undergoing changes here on the website. We're making it more sleek and taking away information that bogged it down. I guess we figure that at this point, the interviews and articles tell the story. See, I have a few friends who have been working on the site all this time. I may have made a movie pretty much by myself, but I am not about, at this point anyway, to tackle html code. I'm still fighting with Facebook for getting the code for my new website!

So one of my friends said that we need to make changes, and sell some DVD's. He so pleasantly reminded me that I haven't made a cent off of the movie and I deserve to after all the hard work I did to make a movie that I didn't want to make in the first place. Ok, I said. Sure, go for it. I'm just a messenger.

While doing the research that I am always doing for water and also restaurant articles, I came across this cool documentary that was released last year. It's called, "Dish: Women, Waitressing and the Art of Service". It has been in a bunch of Film Festivals and I'm glad because it seems to be on the right side of the table so to speak. I just discovered it last night and am looking into it. So check it out. Maybe it's counter productive to promote another's film on my blog, but the way I look at it, if people see it and like it, they might be inclined to watch ours. Besides, hers is a documentary--something people thought I should have made after my first one--and mine is a narrative: she's a filmmaker, I'm a waitress. Hey I was just doing as I felt I was told. You do know that I was in a total zone much of the time I wrote the movie. You didn't? Ah well, listen to the PRI interview and you'll see.

And if you read my other blog on the Remake 4 Water site, you can find out some ideas about water conservation. Let's Do It!

It's just EVERYWHERE!!!

Today I am working on my new website that I have for the project. It will be posted when I am done. (Now I know why so many people get other people to do their websites!)

So, I was getting links for webpages and came across this page about Ben and Jerry's new thing they are doing on Twitter. It just seems that everyone is getting in on the wave of helping others. Isn't it great! I see that Water For People has a new person who is climbing mountains to raise money. His name is Jake Norton and you can read about him here. He's using his skills and passion to help. It's really cool what he is doing. I think it's great because we are all in this together. It doesn't matter how people get water, just so they do!

I'm going to combine things so people are not having to find more money to give. They can give by doing something that they already do and might even learn something in the process. We are always learning!

Once I get my new website up, I will stop blogging here and just use one there. The new website is "remake4water.org". I choose org because I'm not looking to make money or ask for money, I need people. Just one. Just one person who sees the vision like I do (and not just friends, family or strangers whom I tell and they all say it's a swell idea). Just the right person with influence who will say, "Hey, that's a good idea. Yeah, Let's Do It!".

Do you know how many light bulbs were made before the one that worked was produced? Do you know how many publishers she went to before Harry Potter was published? Do you know how many restaurants the Colonel went to before someone agreed with him? (one source says 1009 restaurants!) Hey, I'm not trying to be that influential or big, but you get the idea! I am persistent. This CAN be done! Gotto go!